Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Recently pictures were released showing huge red marks that Adrian left on his son after hitting him with a switch. The details of the case are that he hit his four year old with the switch and stuff leaves in his mouth while doing it. Clearly whatever the child did really pissed him off and he lost control. Now there are a lot of people battling with the difference between child abuse and regular physical discipline.
Adrian Peterson is one of those people that has recently found out his definition of discipline is abuse. Since this case has been discussed so much, he felt compelled to release a statement to the public. In the statement we can tell he has learned his lesson, but there was one problem I had. It was the following statement.
"I have to live with the fact that when I disciplined my son the way I was disciplined as a child, I caused an injury that I never intended or thought would happen."
The lie detector indicates that is a lie. Everyone who has been hit with a switch, belt, extension cord, or even shoe knows it hurt like hell. The madder a parent is the harder they swing whatever they are holding at your bare skin. The intention of hitting a child with any of these items is for them to feel pain.
"Stop crying or I'm going to give you something to cry about." While being hit every child has heard this statement. I have and it hurt even more to hear it, because I couldn't just stop crying while I was still feeling the pain. If Adrian Peterson did get disciplined the way he does his children, then he already knows the pain. He knew it would hurt his child. That is why he told used that switch.
His statement says he has learned his lesson. I hope many other parents also learn from this too. Stop torturing your kids physically if you want them to respect you. Even if Adrian has learned his lesson, his four year old is afraid of him. He'll have to build the trust back up if he ever wants a relationship with that child. Children aren't the only ones who break their parents trust. It is also the opposite way. This is an incident everyone can learn from.
Monday, September 15, 2014
While Love and Hip Hop Atlanta is over, Mona Scott Young is not leaving us bored for a couple of months. Love and Hip Hop Hollywood has started and it is giving the other city some competition with the chosen celebrities. For instance, there is Soulja Boy. The last time many of us remember Soulja Boy, he was crying at the BET Awards in 2012. His tears weren't the most noticeable thing about him though. It was his dirty finger nails. This once-popular rapper was repulsive. However, that didn't stop him from dating.
For a while Soulja Boy and Diamond (of Crime Mobb) were a happy couple. However, last April the two broke up. Diamond is currently on Oxygen's reality television show Sisterhood of Hip Hop and we all know this was taped long before last April. It means they were still dating during the taping.
Now since Love and Hip Hop Hollywood has started, Soulja Boy is now a reality star and he's not alone on the show. He has a girlfriend who claims they've been dating on and off for a long time. Actually, she's the daughter of the oh-so-suave singer Teddy Riley. Her name is Nia Riley and she claims they've been dating for eight long years. She is claiming him hard, but there is a problem.
This would mean he is a pimp of some sorts. Either he is a pimp or both Diamond and this Nia girl have made very dumb relationship choices. I'm not going to quit reality television for real, but this is overwhelming.
Iyanla Vanzant's new season of Fix My Life makes you question who you let inside your vagina even harder. I know it's not just me. The season has started off with a man, Jay Williams, with 17 baby mamas. Since there is enough material to blog about this man for the rest of the year, I decided to give others the spotlight to express their opinions.
The first episode addressed Jay's upbringing. It revealed what kind of parents he had and how they could have possibly led him to create his current disastrous life. While abuse was thrown around a lot, Jay said he loved every woman that he created a child with. A writer and former classmate, Reginald Alceus, agreed to answer several questions pertaining to decisions he would make in finding love and how a man could possibly love 17 women. His explanation is pretty good.
For part two, which featured some of the mothers of Jay's children and a couple of the children, an aspiring journalist by the name of Camille Daniels agreed to answer some questions. The following are her opinions.
If a man charmed you so much that you gave him a kid and then found out he was lying to you about being with other women, what kind of words would he say to you for you to keep giving him kids?
Well, I don’t want children and I fear the day I ever get pregnant. However, if I did get pregnant and decided to raise my child I would accept my responsibility. There’s nothing a man could say that I could let myself do that again. Children don’t ask to be here so why I wouldn’t allow myself to be ok with bringing more children into the world with him? I already have one connection. Why expand that connection? He isn’t worthy of that connection. He’s proven that.
Let’s say you meet a man and he has kids. How many kids are too many kids for you to start dating him?
I think the max would be three. Since I know a real man will always choose his kids over the girl anyway because that’s what a good father does, anything over 0 is too high for me lol. But yeah, anything after 3 feels like a lot. Technically over 5 actually.
Jay Williams reached out to Iyanla Vanzant to help him fix his life of having 17 baby mamas, 34 biological kids, and 9 adopted kids. Do you think it is possible to fix a situation like that?
It can only be successful if the people involved are really ready to do the work and go to the heart of the pain, and also to continue to do the work after the time with Ms. Vanzant has gone. She can’t save you. She can only help you. You have to help yourself to heal.
One of the 17 baby mamas said every woman man-shares. Do you know of women sharing men? Have you ever shared a man with another woman?
Technically we all do man share. What was once yours is now someone else’s or vice versa. Basically when you date and break up or even marry and break up there’s a lot of sharing going on; especially, sexually. But I wouldn’t voluntarily share someone if I had the choice. But as long as you remember your experience with that person is different than what was had in the past with someone else then you should be okay.
Iyanla told the women that they were judging each other and not giving Jay any credit for the mess he created. Do you think as women we tend to attack each other instead of the men causing our problems? Why?
Yes, because it’s natural. I think amongst women especially, there’s like this unofficial girl code, so when someone violates it, especially an actual friend you know, it hurts. We know men are stupid. We just expect the women to do better.
Some of the children agreed to meet with Jay on camera. Could you be brave enough to reveal to the world that your father is a man who has been so irresponsible with his life?
No, I don’t think I could, unless I believed it would help someone else. Otherwise I think it’s best to dealt with in private cause that’s where the real work is waiting to be done.
One of the moms admitted her son has never known who his father is. Would you want to know if Jay was your father?
I think so. At the end of the day, that man is part of who you are, so yes. If I know I can still naturally love you because you’re my parent and I respect you as a person, then yes I want to know you for many reasons, for life lessons, medical and etc.
All of Jay’s older kids that were on the show agreed that it is disgusting being the child of a man with 34 children. Knowing that an overwhelming majority of the men of your generation have a high sex count list, do you find it disgusting? What do you think of Jay Williams?
If you have a high sex count, you have a high sex count. That to me is not the problem as long as you use protection and get tested often. The problem is that you find it ok to have the amount of children that can be found in a New York City public school classroom. He either needs to become a Mormon and become a polygamist or he needs to get a vasectomy, or do both because that’s not right and it’s not healthy. He’s clearly hurting and so are the mothers and all the children. And it’s just sad. This is an example of what it means to be hurt and how you pass it on and attract others who are also clearly hurt.
There is still one more episode left with Jay. The best thing for Iyanla and the others to do is say it was all a prank, like Ashton Kutcher would do. They should all confess to being actors. However, this is real life and one thing the preview reveals is this situation cannot be fixed unless a time machine is invented.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
While the producers of Preachers Of LA have tried their hardest to make this show compete with some of the messier reality television shows out, these preachers are true to their ministries. This week's episode was all about the ministries going on in their families.
We were able to see where Deitrick Haddon gets his charm and his readiness to preach to any crowd. That energy definitely comes from his mom, Prophetess Joyce Haddon. She showed up to the ladies luncheon and fit right in with the rest of the strong personalities. While his mother bonded with the women, Deitrick practiced his fatherly nurturing skills.
Pastor Ron Gibson and his wife Lovette also showed their nurturing skills. They were shown providing a home for their niece, whose mother had battled a drug addiction, and her children. They kindly opened the doors to a second home they own so she could start the journey of healing.
While we saw lots of family bonding, it wouldn't be a reality television show without any drama. This week's drama came from Pastor Wayne Chaney's family.
Pastor Wayne has clearly been absent from the show for the last few episodes, but now we know they were preparing us for the juicy storyline. He and his wife dealt with an issue stemming from his mother and step brother. While they didn't know the full story, his obligation was clearly to help his mom. There was no Jerry Springer type of fight going on like we saw on Love and Hip Hop Atlanta. Instead he heard both sides of the story and decided it would be dealt with at a better time. That is how situations are supposed to be handled.
Actually the real message came from the after show. The after show featured Pastor Wayne Chaney and Pastor Ron Gibson.
While they discussed a few different topics, the message was all about unconditional love. Pastor Wayne described it best at the beginning of the show when referring to Pastor Ron. They are living what they preach. He stated that some preachers can travel the globe, but their own backyards a mess. These preachers clearly have unconditional love for their families and it is wonderful to see.
Singer Wilson Pickett started his career back in 1959, before my parents were even born and his R&B sound was nothing like it would evolve to be today. He didn't sound like the male singers (
Well, Wilson is more classic than the artists in this genre we most often think of. Just the thought of this is interesting. I never considered what genre artists like Wilson, James Brown, and even our favorite female vocalist Tina Turner were singing. Their music that will forever live on as classics were always considered music made to touch the soul.
Clearly R&B has changed a lot through the decades. In 2014 it's not made to create a feeling that will last in our hearts. It's made for us to forget about it within a few weeks. There are a few rare artists out there that know how to get us emotional, but they also try their best to distance themselves away from R&B.