Friday, April 18, 2014

The "How To Love Me" Cheat Sheet Challenge

Necole Kane (necolebitchie.com) has created a great idea for getting men to understand us more. The exercise is to have friends make cliff notes for the man (or men) who will try to win over your heart in the future. I think it's a cool exercise. 

Over and over again men keep saying we women are difficult to love. They can't figure us out, so we find ourselves single for another year. Or is that just my story? The problem is men don't know how to love us. Some approach every single woman the same exact way and that's just not how it works. Each of us has different values, different needs, and different paths we're walking down. 

For instance while I want to experience a family of my own, achieving my goals is more important. Take notes men. I hope a few of my friends will be willing to participate. Not only does this help men out, but it helps us women gain a better understanding of ourselves. 

Give 'Em Up (Poem)

I spelled them wrong on purpose. That needed to be said before anything else.

There's a theme to my poetry this moment. It's all supposed to be an ode to Hip Hop, but not just any Hip Hop. I'm honoring the current music. You know how they say Hip Hop is dead? Well, the poems I'm writing from the lyrics in our everyday music is supposed to prove that its still very much alive and inspiring others. Now the following poem is inspired by Spenzo's "Wife Er."

"I can never wife her,
Only one night her
Women full of lies"
So I contemplate if it's worth it
Never having real special moments
No dates in the park
And no fancy restaurants
Our friends won't officially meet
And no introductions to parents either
It'll be something like a secret
Rendezvous in the middle of the night
Cause sex is the only thing on his mind
So I contemplate if I can give 'em up
Next to sleep, feelings are hard to fight
But in order to do it
I'd have to put 'em to the side
But do I want to
Sex without love is just a distant memory
Almost surreal
You're supposed to appreciate the intimacy
But at the same time remember it's not real
And I don't trust him
Just as much as he hates me
I can tell he's a man full of lies
P.S. I'm mad he took the H off of her and named the song "Wife Er."

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Five Hour Phone Call With The Other Woman

Men cheat. It's been proven time and time again. They are also very sloppy when doing it. For instance, for no particular reason other than boredom I've been watching Black Ink Crew. If you watch it, then you're acquainted with the dysfunctional relationships. No one on the show has a relationship with regular problems; especially Dutchess and Caesar.

Caesar is the owner of the shop and Dutchess is always in competition for craziest girlfriend of the year. During the first season she did her best to reck every friendship/employee relationship he had. What we didn't see on camera was her heart issues and her miscarriage. So maybe Dutchess wasn't as bad as television portrayed her, but Caesar fucked up. He fucked up in the biggest way possible. The nigga cheated.

Caesar didn't just cheat. He was laid up with another woman when she called to confront the other woman. According to Dutchess, the other woman handed over the phone to him to prove what was going on. Then they had a five hour conversation. No, let me correct that. THEY HAD A DAMN FIVE HOUR CONVERSATION.

During the conversation the women exchanged many words. The other woman went on to say Caesar had told her they were eventually getting married. However, none of that shit matters. They stayed on the phone for five damn hours. Who talks to the woman that her man is cheating on her with that long.

How long would you have spoken to her?

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Or Nahh (Poem)

Via Fresh-Tops

Do you like the way I say your name…Or nahh…Trying to reach you on the phone, but only getting ring back tones…Leaving voicemails letting you know there's no one else on my mind…Do you like the way I sound…Or nahh…Thirsty for your attention…Faithfully waiting to be claimed…Can I be your wife…Or we can move slow and you call me Bae…Your power is so strong I just can't wait…Your money on my mind…Stacking seven figures a year…Your body so fine…Can you imagine yours on top of mine…Or nahh…You say you want a girl that does the most…Ride or die for her man…But you won't return that favor…A girl that's the best at sex…a Scorpio in her natural zone…Not the type you'll take home to mom…But you'll still disappear for days at a time…You sounding real funny…I am really what you want…Or nah!


I was looking for a picture to match the poem and came across a cool shirt. This shall be added to my wardrobe soon. 

Monday, April 14, 2014

Hold On Tight (Poem)

My Photo
Hold on tight
I'm not for the faint of heart
If you follow me, we're going for a ride

My love is not smooth
Can you handle bumpy roads
Dealing with ignored requests
I was too busy
I really needed to rest
Plus you're not the biggest passion on my list

And anger left unexpressed
It's the same shit over and over again
You made the plans
But when it was time to go on the date
You disappeared
Days later we pretend it never happened
Just like that girl I saw you with
Didn't we become official
I'm supposed to be your one and only
And yet I say nothing
Just let it all build up
Don't be surprised the day I explode

Hold on tight
Sometimes you'll be confused
As we're chilling at construction sites
Trying to fix the issues we have
Or at least see if they're fixable
Sure the sex is great
But after you've made me cry
And after I've called you every name in the book
Is love what we're really making

Hold on tight
You don't want to look like a weak man
Cursing every girl that comes after me
So angry with one experience you can't move on
She's not a Bird
Just another young black woman looking for love
So give her that
And don't worry about me
I'll be alright


Lost Souls, Coping With Words Ignored

As a writer I spend a lot of time thinking about words ignored. I've spent a lot more time thinking about this topic than anyone knows.

It's so easy to talk about because of ignored phone calls, ignored text messages, people being mean on social media, and bragging about being mean on social media. Sometimes people can be so cruel. They can say the meanest of words to others or they can be cruel just by ignoring someone. How do we know that the person we're ignoring doesn't need someone to just pay attention in that moment? I think about it every time someone says something so unnecessary online.

For instance, a girl got mad because people that she doesn't follow entered her mentions on twitter the other day. She thought it was funny to laugh at them, but it's called socializing. What's so wrong with that? I think about ignored words whenever I send someone a message and wait for a reply that never comes and then I think about them again when I make a conscious decision to remove any physical traces of those people from my life.

I'm not sure when evil became so popular. Maybe it was always like this and I just created this comfortable ignorant bliss of a bubble for too long. Actually society created the bubble. The world we live in gave ideas that everyone can seek help while leaving out the problems in getting help. There's counselors for all sorts of issues, but they're getting paychecks so they're not always available. Counselors disappear real quick when you have no money. There are pastors in every community, but at some point they have to take care of their own homes. There is your family, but often times if they think different they'll tell you to do differently than what you really need. There are your friends, but friends get busy. Sometimes friends need you more than they realize you need them. Then again some friendships are so fragile, they may never realize how much you are suffering. They're not trying to ignore you, but there are so many obstacles keeping them from paying attention to your words.

For a couple days now I've been thinking about the silence some people need help receive. I've also been thinking about the people that turn away from getting help to deal with their issues, and the ones who seek help but still choose to be lost souls.

For instance, after hearing about Karyn Washington's death I found myself messaging all these people asking if they were okay and how they were doing. These were people who purposely chose to pretend not to have my number, people who could have easily asked me but didn't, and just random strangers. I felt concern for them. I wanted them to know that I care about their words. I'm not the one that ignores people when they need the attention.

The crazy thing is my words were ignored heavily at one point. I was just a teenager, but that teenager had no one to talk to. That teenager would wait until everyone fell asleep and then cry herself to sleep at night. Sometime later a girl told that same teen that they thought she was very strong and the way she handled situations inspired them. They didn't know she was crying herself to sleep to cope with everything.

Even if I did have someone to talk to during that time, it probably wouldn't have helped. Crying myself to sleep helped a whole lot, which is why I have to learn to cope with not being able to help others. I can't always be there when someone else needs me. Just like a counselor leaves the job at some point, I have obligations that isolate me from them. I have to deal with the fact that like many others, I can comes across mean and unapproachable. You won't see me brag about ignoring any phone calls on social media, but there are days when my mood gets sour. I have to learn that I'm still coping with my own personal issues. Can you really help someone when you still need to help yourself?

How exactly can a caring person deal with knowing they can't always be there when someone needs them? It's easy to talk about it, but I don't want to beat myself up every time it happens.

This is the Sunday Reflections post I couldn't figure out how to write yesterday.





Friday, April 11, 2014

Bittersweet (Poem)

The following is more poetry for National Poetry Month.


"I'm a turn life into a hotel
Check you into your suite
Show you all the finer things
You deserve better baby"

And just like that his verbal promises started
And just like that her mind was open again
She wanted a date
And he promised her two
She had a taste for certain food
And he convinced her that's what he liked too
Even when it came to the movies
He convinced her that he'd be there
Together they'd be in awe at Frankie & Alice
and together they'd laugh at A Haunted House 2
But she knew these were just surface promises
With the next man, she'd push the limit
She explained that their relationship had to be deeper
She explained her self confidence issues
How sometimes she felt like the prettiest girl in the world
And other times she was tortured with a pain too deep
It felt like she would never heal
So he promised he'd do his best too make her feel good
Even though he questioned his own capabilities
He knew he was more like the man society made him out to be
A flake, he didn't really want to take her out on any dates
A deadbeat, no matter what happened he planned to leave
A liar, it all sounded better than the truth
But none of that is what he wanted to be
What about the man that followed through with his promises
And prove they really did have lots in common
He wanted to be the man that would make a good husband
Someone she could be proud to claim as her own
And she knew she'd be doing a lot of ego stroking
If they made it work she'd have to mold him
Help him to be the man she need him to be
While at the same time still molding herself
 

No More Marrying The Game? #MarryingTheGame

From reports of broken noses to messy Intagram messages it's been a rough past couple of days for two familiar faces from Vh1.

It all started when a police report was leaked to the press. It stated that The Game (Jayceon Taylor) and his ex-fiancee Tiffany Cambridge were involved in a domestic dispute back in March. This ended with Tiffany's nose being broken.

Then the controversy between the two deepened when one of The Game's enemy's, 40 Glocc supposedly posted up a picture followed by disrespectful messages aimed at Tiffany and the children. The message called the children ugly and had him mentioning not wanting them around when she sucked his D later that night. We'll say he supposedly did this since hours later he claimed his Instagram had been hacked. However, 40 Glocc was just a tiny bit of wind alerting us to the real storm.

Via his own Instagram The Game shared a heartbreaking message about not being able to see his kids.

“Doing the best I can not to break.. But it’s funny how someone you’ve done so much for can be so ugly & cruel as to keep my children away from me vindictively because I’ve decided to move on with my life. I love all 3 of my kids more than life itself & it’s one thing to keep me away from them.. & them away from me but @harlemcarontaylor hasn’t seen his younger brother or sister in a month & just texted me “Dad, how come Justice can’t come to my house” & I have to lie to him because he’s to young to understand the real reason why. I know they ask about me, I know they love me & I know they miss me as much as I miss them but were not allowed to see each other & for what ??? As if I haven’t been there for them everyday since the day they were born…. They are the only reason I care about breathing another day on earth… They are the sole reason I have become a better person… They are the reason I give back, the reason I help people & the reason I wake up everyday with a smile on my face. Most importantly… They are MY CHILDREN & we deserve to be in each other’s lives forever. What kind of person would get in the middle of someone’s devoted fatherhood when there are countless women out here that are raising there children on there own with no one to help. You would think a father that loves his children the way I do would be the least bit appreciated & not have to beg someone to see his own children. I have worked so hard at being a good parent only to have it taken away by someone who cares not about me, nor the welfare of our children but only about themselves. All of this just so you can keep me away from Justice on his birthday. What lie y’all gone tell em’ when his Daddy ain’t there ? Like I have been the past 6 birthdays ? The past 6 Christmas’s ? The past 6 years of a sons life whom got his name from a father that patiently awaited his arrival here into this world ??? & Cali….. I’m not gone even start.. I will end this by saying…. Daddy loves you…. Misses you… & will always be here no matter what happens !!!! I am a REAL FATHER.”

Before the popular reality show he and Tiffany had been dating on and off for seven years. The signs that their relationship was the tightest was already there. However, from the start of the show they seemed like any other normal dysfunctional family. They loved each other and were raising two kids together. At least it seemed normal up until the point where Tiffany called off the wedding. Season 2 of the show arrived and it was all about co-parenting. See, Vh1 can take anyone's reality and profit from it. Now they've gone from co-parenting to domestic disputes and The Game not being able to see his kids. WOW!

The toughest part of reality television has to be the reality that we all miss. We know relationships aren't perfect but its some shocking stuff going on. If there will be a 3rd season, we probably won't see this part of the drama unfold. Then again even with Mary Mary, we were blindsided with Tina Campbell's marital issues. Who knew her husband was getting fulfilled by other women while she was on tour?

I titled the post "No More Marrying The Game?" because the television show was meant to show the world that they were taking their love to a new level. However, now it looks like the love don't live there anymore.

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Money Fantasy (Poem)

"Tell me your thoughts and you better not lie to me
Slangin' that product, and I'm a product of my community
And I'm a product"
What do I have to do to make enough money in this world…Waking up every day and working my ass off…Just for the first of the month to roll around…And it's all given away…Gotta have a roof over my head…A place to sleep after a long day of catering to everyone else…But for me when will it all pay off…Having a little extra for that emergency fund…Having a little stored away for that dream vacation trip…Even more to travel a couple times a year…Being stable enough to skip a few paychecks…Or enough money to make a big move to a brand new atmosphere…Is it all in patience…They say just take it a day at a time…Do as you're told…And eventually wonderful things will unfold…Well I've been waiting…And waiting
"If money ain't the convo, tell me what the Hell you called for
As soon as the block close, it's just me and my vatos"
Getting desperate for more money…Getting desperate to search out new plans…The rappers saying drugs are the answer…Future and his crew got a whole song dedicated to moving that dope…While Rick Ross has created such a huge fantasy we forget selling drugs was never his reality…Looking to the business professionals desperately searching out answers…How'd they become so content with just enough…What did they do to get paychecks equalling six figures and more…But they're only offering vague answers…
"I'm talkin' pesos, nigga leave me the fuck alone
I'm talkin' big chips, nachos"
The comfort of where I am now hugs me…Holds me tight…Promises that if I just be happy with it, it'll keep me warm at night…But the dream of having more is enticing…The idea of having one extra material possession…Or seeing one new place that I've never been…The fact that more money provides a little more than I could ever imagine keeps me scheming…


Wednesday, April 9, 2014

(Parody) #WeAreYoungMoney Welcome Home Boosie


The following video is a result of searching youtube too long. There's a series out called "We Are Young Money" which is basically a cartoon parody of the Young Money crew. While I haven't watched all the videos, the following one is pretty funny.

By now everyone knows that Lil Boosie has been released from prison. Since he's on parole he can't leave the state of Lousiana, but Boosie is still making appearances. He has released new music, made a new music video, and is even booking spots. For instance, in the parody Boosie visits the Young Money house to make an important announcement. It's hilarious. Watch below.

"I call my homies Bae"