Reflections and Lessons Learned

It's the last Sunday of 2009 and I can honestly say it's been a journey. I don't even remember the first Sunday of this year, but what I do remember is...
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January of 2009

In January of 2009 I had a motto for the year. The motto was to live life by each moment and not stress what I could not help. Well, of course that motto was broken. First, I experienced a tough class, which I found myself crying over some nights. Then I ended up dropping the class because I did not want to get an F or a D. In the summer I took the class over. I know my work was better because I was better at what I was doing. However, I still got a C and I found myself upset over that. On top of that the class was taught by only one professor and I was upset that after all of my struggling it seemed like he still did not believe in my capabilities.

Even worse, I would have to deal with that same professor for another class. On top of that I had to deal with a new professor (actually assistant to the professor), who was a straight pain in the ass. I also received a C in this professor's class. It made me mad.

While a C is passing, it also means these professors don't believe in me but also don't want to continue to deal with me. That also hurts because while I did a lot of work, I also felt an obligation to try and please (also known as suck up to) these professors. It all seemed like a waste of time in the end.

However, lessons did come out of these experiences. I learned that there are going to be times where the people you need to believe in you most are not going to. They are going to think the worse about you. No matter what you say or do their thoughts about you will remain the same.

I also learned that stress is inevitable and some people will not be happy until the stress has killed you. My 12-year-old brother told me that authors don't become famous until they die.