Boundaries

Will boundaries still exist when our kids have kids?

Friendship/Family boundaries:
We put rules in place for specific reasons. Some people prefer visitors to take their shoes off upon walking into their house. Some people create rules to only keep out-going people around them, so it will cater to what they already love to do.

One of my biggest personal struggles have been with hugging. Hugging is another form of showing love from one person to another. Outside of my immediately family (parents, brothers, grandparents, aunts, uncles) I've never been real comfortable with hugging. It's a genuine act, but I peter not to be touched unless we're that cool. I can hug my close friends because that bond is there. Otherwise, it always feels like some stranger is barging into my space.

Sexual Boundaries:
The more men I meet the more sexual boundaries become non-existent. But, I hold onto the rules I've created. One rule is no three-somes. I could never even imagine sex with two other people being involved at the same time. Sex is supposed to be a very emotionally vulnerable, private act. However, having two women seems to be almost every man's fantasy. Well, for some of these men it has already become their reality so they think I'm weird when I'm turned off by the idea.

The lack of boundaries go past three-somes. Some of these men go far and beyond with the sex acts they think up in their head. They've surpassed the ideas women sucking and swallowing, getting sex from behind, and trying out a few other sexual positions. They're comfortable talking about going both ways, being bi-sexual. They are comfortable talking about having sex with other men. I've even met a few that privately told me how they experimented with men, but had grown past it. Can you ever get over that?

The hottest topics on sex are eating pussy, eating ass, and how far a person is willing to travel for it. Although, the travel part doesn't have to happen. There's a professional industry made for phone sex, not just the porn HBO loves to show. Even more, STD's (sexually transmitted diseases) still exist.

Where Did The Lack of Boundaries Derive From?
I guess we could blame music. You can only hear the words hoe, THOT, Bitch, and a lady mixed in so much until you don't know the different between lady and the other words.

We could also blame single parent households. Some people think only having one parent creates room for a child to not learn all the values that they need in this society.

We could also blame school. In school we're put in a cookie cutter environment. Everyone is set up to think the same way inside the classroom. This lesson carries onto our art, music, television, and even career choices.

I've created rules and broken some of my set-in-stone rules do to peer pressure. Is peer pressure to blame? Some people are just not taught that "NO" is an acceptable word. Maybe that should start being used more often.

Holding Onto Boundaries:
Will our children's children still have boundaries? The next generation is slowly losing sight of personal values. Well, my brothers (16 and 11) still have them. They probably learned to not let everyone and everything in their personal space from me. But will the children born 20 and 30 years from now have beliefs, personal rules, lines that they won't cross?