Going So Hard (New Poem) And New Poetry Experience

It's the middle of the week and another very long work week, but that hasn't kept me from enjoying myself this week. Who says you have to wait to the weekend? I didn't. Instead Tuesday night I went to the Taft Street Book Store (located downtown) for poetry night. It had been a while since I last went to a poetry spot, so it was very refreshing. While there I got brave and put my name on the reading list. The poem I chose to red is "Going So Hard."

I wrote this poem after listening to Kanye and Jay-Z's song "Niggas In Paris." While Kanye West is quite cocky, this poem just states the facts of a struggling girl. I'm nowhere near Paris. Now check "Going So Hard" out below.

I’m going so hard

5 years…A college degree… A good job to please everybody but…I’m going so hard… Working my ass off…but it’s never enough…8 long hours a day… 40 hours a week…Working just for the money, slave to health benefits, slave to bills being paid, slave to a warm place to lay my head…Dreams of love, cupid aiming his arrow at me, old school rap where the lyrics went hard, and where Disney World was the limit, higher than the sky, a funnel cake was enough to make a girl smile….I’m going so hard, learning so much, filling my mind, but it’s never enough…Too human, always a mistake…. Misspelled words haunt my dreams…People‘s criticism haunts my thinking, change the make-up, it‘s too loud, change the hairstyle, it‘s too wild, speak louder, talk more, write more, read less, forget the old, what’s new, crawl before you walk, but crawl fast so walking can come faster, focus on what‘s important, drop your goals…Goals are for hoes, people with a whole in their heart, trying to fulfill something that always has a start, but never an ending, cause even if a girl achieves something she has to create something new so life can continue to be worth living…I create, share, fail, stumble, fall, get back up but get knocked right back down again… I’m going so hard, going so hard…trying to figure out how to get back to happy again… trying to figure out if happy was ever…or always just a figment of my imagination….I‘m going so hard, sitting and typing, sitting and writing, just to get the thoughts out my head…Block out the rest of the world, live in a bubble, waits for it to pop, bring me back to reality…I’m going so hard…trying to hold onto a lifestyle, party every once in a while, date and pretend there’s hope for a love life, smile even though family doesn’t always know what’s right….I’m going so hard, fighting for what’s right but befriending wrong because seems like right abandoned me a long time ago….I’m gong so hard, trying to achieve the American dream, even though it seems as though in the midst of politics America abandoned me a long time ago…I’m going so hard, like 95% of the rest of the world I’m letting others guide my start…I’m going so hard, cause money’s the motivation, money’s the ultimate destination…So I’m going so hard, trying to block out the daily thoughts that cross my mind…Going so hard to be like everyone else. Original is so out of style 

BTW: Whole was spelled that way on purpose. If you didn't get it, think about it.