Sunday, November 20, 2011

Sunday Reflections: Reflections Of Freedom

Yesterday on twitter a friend talked about the years where she had freedom. The time she mentioned was the first three years of being in college. There were no specific moments mentioned. It was just a consecutive time where she felt free. There was no pressure, no stress, no depressing moments, etc. She was happy. Now she wants that feeling of freedom back. However, although she did have those years of freedom there are some people who never even go a year feeling free. Some of us continuously feel like we are trapped in a prison and have to grasp onto special moments during those times of living in prison.

Sidenote: From what I've heard prison is very structured. They have a place to sleep, designated times to eat, special crafts that allow them to work, and break times that are similar to recess on a playground.

Sadly I'm one of those people that's never experienced a consecutive period of freedom. However, there have been a couple moments where I felt free. Keep reading to learn about those moments.

Leaving The Bahamas At 11 Years Old
Back in the day I was in this christian girls organization called Kujichagulia. At the end of each year (specifically each summer) we went on a big trip. That year the trip was a cruise to the Bahamas. My parents didn't want to go, but since they knew people who were going they allowed me to. They thought I'd have a chaperon 24/7. Anyway the whole trip should have been a feeling of freedom. Actually the whole trip was a feeling of freedom. All I remember is free ice cream and lots of swimming. The most memorable moment of the trip was the very last night and I was actually not awake through it. According to my roommate the boat was very rocky and she felt sea sick from it. The rockiness also made it hard for her to sleep. I, on the other hand, slept peacefully. I didn't feel any rockiness, sea sick feelings, or any feelings of being scared. I had sweet dreams that night. That was freedom.

The Day In High School When I Read My First Zane Book
Reading has always been one of my addictions. By age seven I was over the little kid books and into teen books with over 100 pages and no pictures. Then by age 10 I was over teen books and into young adult. By middle school the popular books became anything that was located in the African American fiction section of the bookstore. However, my parents were strict and thought I was too young for those books. So I got my thrill of adult reading from white authors they'd never heard of. Then one day in high school someone had a Zane book. I asked if I could read it and kept reading it until the very last class of the day. Somehow the workload that day was light and the teacher's did not call me out for not paying attention. I probably would have cared if I did get in trouble anyway. It was just me and that Zane book. FREEDOM!

The Very First Club I Attended 
College was something I could not wait for because I actually thought I'd experience freedom. And yes, there were moments of freedom. One of those moments came on my very second night of living in the dorms. I went with one of my new friends to a club. That club was Mt. Zion, not to be confused with a church. It was a straight up hole in the wall club. It was hood and 98% of the people in there smoked weed. You may be wondering how a club like that could signify freedom. Well it let me know that I was not in Stafford America anymore. I was really in the real world with real people that were not trying to influence me to only do good. FREEDOM!

The Day I Walked To Popeyes
It was a spring break. I was sad. All of my friends had left the city to do fun things that young people do during spring break. However, I had been reminded a million times that I was not special enough to have as much fun as them. Believe it or not, that is what a person starts hearing when you tell them enough times that they don't have enough money, could get hurt or kidnapped, or killed by strangers. So, after feeling depressed for enough time I decided I wanted to get out of the house. Part of that reason was because I was starving. In the midst of boredom and starvation the best idea ever hit me. It was to walk to Popeyes. For those of you who have lived in Tallahassee (and those of you who have not) Popeyes is around the corner. It's just not in walking distance. So I did it and then when I arrived I thought about riding the bus back home. Instead I walked back home through that dangerous neighborhood that surrounds Florida A&M University. It was crazy, fun, and all that other random stuff that helps create memorable moments. FREEDOM!

The Day I Called Him And Went Over To His House 
This year was the first year that people really got exposure into my dating life. I blame that damn Facebook relationship section. Anyway, after getting over a very confusing man, I was ready to move on. One day while sitting in my car at the park I was extremely bored and brave. Bravery led me to search through my phone and see whose life I'd want to intrude on randomly. I found the perfect person. Some people are addicted to texting. This guy is one of them. So instead of texting I called and he actually answered. When he answered whatever speech I had planned slipped my mind. Instead I was straightforward and asked if I could go to his house at that moment. Once I arrived I was completely relaxed. Part of that was the fact that he was caught off guard. But the point is that it was FREEDOM!

The Day At Malibu Beach 
It's something about water. Enough said. FREEDOM!

Sure the have been moments where my friends helped me create freedom. However, these moments were about creating freedom for myself. Those are only moments though. The real goal is to have a period of nothing but freedom. How about you? Do you have moments that made you feel free? Do you have an idea of what creates freedom for you? Are you already living in freedom?

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