An In-My-Feelings Moment

You know how sometimes you have so much on your mind, but you just don't know how to talk to others about it. You don't want to come off ungrateful or super needy. You don't want to come off insensitive because you know others have issues of their own and can't cater to you. Well, I have some stuff weighing heavily on my mind and this seems to be the best place to let it all out.

On October 30th I turn 28. Approximately a week later the Blogalicious conference happens. I won't be in attendance. I've been thinking about this conference since May. I've been dreaming of what it would be like, how much better I could do at it than what I did at the Blogging While Brown conference as far as meeting people goes, how much more I could learn from going to this brand new event (for me), and how nothing could possibly stop me from going. Well, money is stopping me. Unfortunately I'm not in a financial place to charge another $1,000 to my credit card and escape out of the city.

This was supposed to be the year of new goals being accomplished. Not only was I supposed to go to New York City for the second time, but I was also supposed to plan for at least one blogging conference happening right in my own state (for this year at least). That would be the Blogalicious conference that happens in November. I desperately wanted to do more than sit behind the computer, write, and promote this year. I wanted to be on the scene meeting other people like me; people passionate about writing. It's not going to happen.

Moving out of Texas is not about to happen this year. A conference is not about to happen this year. The biggest thing that will happen is I might get a chance to take a week off for my birthday. The week I turn 28 I'll be trying to figure out a million things to do in Houston with barely any money and no one to hang out with. Friends may join me for one night of clubbing, but I'll have to remind them 20 times in order to make it happen. The older I get the more annoying it gets to remind others that my birthday is actually important to me. So you already know how my mind is going to go the closer it gets to October. Please don't tell me how I could be worse off. I really don't care at this moment.