Monday, July 23, 2012

A Place Of My Own, Goal Almost Accomplished

A while ago I started telling you all about my goal of moving somewhere by myself. Unfortunately that move is not about to be California right away. My real long term goals for life are still deferred. Instead I've chosen to try to settle in this place I've been in far too long already. So over the past couple of months I've been apartment hunting and a week ago a cute little spot showed it's face. I've found what could be the very first place of my own.

I'm not going to reveal the name of the apartment complex to you yet. However, it is located in a relatively busy spot. It's nice and it lights my heart up. For real, I'm so happy to have seen it. There are a few problems though.

One problem is stability. Am I stable enough to successfully move into this place with no worries? Over the years I've always dreamed of exactly what I wanted. Making sure I had enough money was never an issue. At 25 years old it is becoming an issue. This is mostly because we live in an economy where a super rich white man who has never struggled in his entire life is running for president. Because he's never struggled he doesn't give a damn about people like me. People like me are the people struggling to keep hope alive, but can never figure out how to move one step forward without getting knocked a step back.

My list of problems with this place could go on forever. Most people won't admit this, but I'm scared. What if something goes wrong? I'm alone in this world. I searched for this place alone. No one has volunteered to look at this place before I move into it. I put out an invitation for someone to  look with me and that person agreed. However, they'll never set out a time to actually see it. It is not important to them. When I pay the down deposit and sign the lease my name will be listed alone on the contract. This is all a lot to think about.

Negativity aside I've had a goal of living on my own for the longest. During my college years I vowed to never ever have a roommate again once I left. I'm keeping that vow until I get married. Once I sign that lease the goal will finally be accomplished.

This journey of getting where I want seems to be never ending.

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