Thursday, June 16, 2011

Intellectual Question: How Much Pride Is Too Much Pride?

So I just finished reading a blog post on pain and men opening up to women about past relationships. Women can express themselves freely when it comes to ex-boo's because society says we're an emotional mess. However, men on the other hand struggle with pain. Men are expected to never reveal their pain. Shut up. Man Up. Comfort and not get comforted. Well, those are the words of others, not me. Men are essentially thought of has having too much pride (or at least trying to), but reality is women are not the same as ten years ago. Women have just as much pride as men.

How do prideful people act? Having pride is when you finally stop asking for money. Having pride is when you'd rather sleep on the side of the street instead of run to family and friends for help. Okay, those are extremes, but for real pride is when you say for the first time "I don't need a man." Pride is when you mess up, everyone gets mad at you, and you don't even react (out loud).  Pride is when you tell your family you're grown and you want to live your life your way. Know what I'm mean? Having pride is when you start to act arrogant, conceded, confident, sexy, beautiful, and all those other words to people at the same time. 

While pride can lift you up, it can also destroy you. Having pride can make you feel like your best friend and worse enemy. So how much pride is too much pride?
Just think about it. We've all heard a story about a struggling person. That person was so poor that their lights were getting cut off and they were five days away from an eviction notice. If they would have asked, someone in their family would have gladly let them move in. However, people in their family  had ripped their self esteem apart so many times, they didn't want anyone to know how they had messed up again. Well, they could be the smartest ones in their family, but they messed up and their pride would not allow them to admit their mistake. Instead they wanted to fix things themselves. 

We all also know the dependent child. She had what felt like the perfect life, but she wanted better. She wanted to be miss independent. That's what Neyo likes. She wanted everyone to know she had a voice of her own. The season finale of Braxton Family Values came on two days ago and I can still hear Tamar's voice. She wanted to make her own mistakes and be able to deal with them herself. I once said if I ever became pregnant (no marriage or boyfriend), became financially unstable (technically I'm there), or made any other terrible mistakes (or even small ones), I would want to shrug them off. I was and still am tired of other people trying to control my ever move. Now that's pride talking. 

When you feed all your emotions to others, they see you as weak. Some of them want you to stay that way and others want you to "man up" or gain some pride, because pride is strength. However, not all pride puts you in a positive light. So how much pride is too much pride? Is there really a limit or is it up to you to decide how prideful you should be and how much emotion you should show?

I'm really confused. It seems as if when you get emotional people play on your weaknesses and when you find pride people try to use it against you.  

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