Friday, May 18, 2012

This Is Not About Everyone Else

As you already know I just came back from Hawaii. It really happened, but at the same time it seems like it was just a dream. It feels as if my friend's apartment near the beach, the beautiful ocean, and the biggest outdoor mall in the world was just a week where I decided not to open my eyes to reality. However, the trip took place and at the end of the vacation my dad picked me up from the airport ready for another thoughtful (sarcastic voice) conversation. It went something like this.

"So you've been to California and Hawaii, two places most people just dream of."-- My dad

Forget whatever was said before and after that. He may not have said those exact words, but he brought up that not everyone gets to go to those places. That bothered me to the utmost extreme. This is mostly because my goals are not about everyone else. 

Some people plan out their lives to make others happy. They want to help the poor, educate the children, or be role models to to whoever is willing to pay attention. Some people live for the money. I have a friend who is super boring, but has admitted he loves seeing money pile up in his bank account. What he plans to do with the money is a mystery to himself and everyone else. However, spending the money does not matter. It's all about making it. Some people live for contentment. I might be one of them. 

I want to wake up every day to a life I always dreamed about. I want to be able to one day turn on my computer and overdose on both words and on the words others have to offer. I want to experience new places in life. One day I can see myself waking up somewhere in California and running off to the beach for a relaxing day. Then again there's a fantasy of joining the millions of people that live in the overcrowded big city known as New York City.There's also a fantasy of being somewhere with like minded people that I can socialize with. No one wants to be alone in the world forever. Then again there are so many other dreams and goals invested in my mind. 

I live for contentment. I live to wake up every morning smiling. It is all about me. This is why I don't understand why my dad or anyone else would want to remind me of what others are not doing during this time in life. 

I'm 25 with no kids and no boyfriend. I just want to live. This is not about everyone else. Someone will understand this post. 

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