Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Sexy Advice: He Took A Part Of Me

(Disclaimer: Since I love to talk about relationships, I'm going to try to stick to relationships on this one.)

Each person takes a part of you. Whether you realize it or not you give up a part of yourself to someone you have feelings for. Those feelings can involve family matters, romance, and even friendships.

As far as family goes....

He took a part of me. He is my "real" dad. What he stole from me was chivalry. Chivalry (in my opinion) is when a man does everything he can to make a woman feel like a queen. However, this isn't just reserved for his girlfriend or wife. This can also be reserved for his child. However, he took chivalry from me. In place of chivalry he let me know that men do not have to provide for you just because you're a woman or a child.

As far as relationships go...

He took fairy tales from me. He was my first crush. In a fairy tale the woman always gets her man and the man always gets his woman. However, I ended up with a broken heart. My first crush didn't like me. He flirted with me and tried to let me down easily, but bottom line is he broke my heart. He wasn't prince charming and I wasn't his princess. 

He took my innocence from me. He was the first guy I had sex with. I was confused that night. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to do it. Afterward I was definitely sure I didn't want to do it with him anymore, but it didn't matter. He had taken my innocence. In replace of my innocence he gave me a voice. He wasn't the nicest guy. In fact he was the kind of guy that would hit a girl if he was pushed to that point. While I didn't want to get hit, I still spoke up for myself. After all, he wasn't a real friend anyway. 

He took tears from me. He was my "light skinned" dream. He came off as nice in the beginning. He let me know what kind of family he came from, how often he went to church, and the kind of wife he looked forward to marrying. I became hooked to him to quickly. I loved his looks (shallow), the way he talked, the way he whispered to me even when no one was around, the smell of his cologne, and the way he held me. He always held me tight like he never wanted to let me go. However, he abandoned me more than once. The first time it was for his ex. The times after that came from being truthful. He'd be truthful and then try to take his words back. The tears came until they stopped coming. he replaced those tears with acceptance. I started to accept the fact that niggas were going to fuck up and there was nothing I could do about it. I accept the fact hat niggas would break my heart and I just had to pick up the pieces and sow it back together myself. 

The last guy took emotions away from me. This dude was the best I've had so far. He unknowingly brought some chivalry back into my life. He showed me what romance looks like. He reminded me of what it feels like to have a soul mate. We were too much alike. However, we didn't know each other well enough. It takes time to really learn your significant other, but he didn't realize that. He threw too much at me. He told me he loved me and that was what I liked about him. I could see it in his eyes and it felt good. He told me several other things, such as he couldn't handle being in a relationship. It was all too much at once. I didn't know what to feel, but he felt it all for me. He went from sad to mad because I wasn't sure if I wanted to be friends with him anymore. He poured out his emotions to me, even mentioning his broken heart. But I couldn't do anything about that. I can't heal his broken heart. Only he can, because it's a mental thing. 

What he did leave me with was realization. The realization is I have to move on. Actually they all left me with that. Life goes on. You can't dwell on one individual or how they messed up a part of your life. In fact this doesn't just happen when it comes to the opposite sex. Your family can drive you crazy or your peers can leave you feeling confused. What matters is how you pick up the pieces and move on with your life. 

(P.S. Don't look at me different. Each of the parts that were taken from me can be gotten back, except for my innocence. I don't need it anymore.)

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