Sunday, April 1, 2012

The Girl Who Jumped Through A Closed Window

This is a Sunday Reflections post.

There was once a girl who jumped through a closed window. Before it happened she checked to make sure the glass would shatter easily. It couldn't be hard decorative glass that would only leave her with a sore arm. She had to break that thing down. She had to achieve her goal. She needed to run full speed through that glass and land outside. She needed to get out. Jumping was the only way. It wasn't by accident though. She had been planning it for a while.

It all started when she was a little girl and had to hear a thousand no's.

"Can I go outside and play?"
Not right now.
"Can I take some snacks out for my friends?"
Not my food.
"I think I want to be a singer when I grow up."
No, you don't have any talent.
"I want to be an author and gets books published."
But you're not like the authors.
"When I grow up I'm going to marry Lil Wayne."
Now that's just funny.
"I want a sweet 16."
Oops, we forgot. You'll get a birthday party next year.
"I can't wait to grow up."
No, you're lying. You want to stay young forever.
"I just want to go hang out with my friends."
No, they're not your friends. You've never hung with them before.
"I'm going to college and majoring in journalism or psychology."
No, you don't want to do that. Go for something that makes lots of money.
"For spring break I want to do big things."
No, it's too dangerous for you.
"Did you hear about all the latest news on celebrities?"
No, I don't want to know about them. I want to know about your interests and experiences.
"Ugh, I just want to be alone."
No, you want all of us to smother you until the end of time.
"Well I just want to breathe."
That doesn't even make sense.

There are two options for a girl that's heard the word no all her life.

One option is to really believe she's incapable to of doing. This means she'll never understand growing up, being self sufficient, and learning from her mistakes. The words no came be so powerful.

The other option is that she'll become rebel. She'll remember all those times she heard no and try to turn them into yes. She'll make every mistake in the book, but eventually succeed at something. The first time she succeeds will become the best day of her life. It will be the best day because it won't be done according to someone else's opinion. She'll have heard "No" and then successfully do it anyway. She'll compare that success to jumping through a closed window.

Windows are made for decoration. We use them when someone knocks on the door. Instead of automatically opening the door we peek through the window to see who it is. We also use them to let sunshine into hour house. My dad has this habit of opening up every single blind in the house when it's a beautiful day. By opening the blinds we can see the beauty that we're not actually experiencing. However, some of us desperately need to feel that beauty. Seeing it from a closed space is not good enough.

Some people get through the window by opening the door. That's the easy way out, but life isn't always that easy.

Some people get through the window by opening it up and climbing through. Depending on how it is made, that can be a struggle. However, sometimes they have latches that easily come open. This is that part of life where you never know what will happen.

However, some windows can't be easily opened at all. They have no latches or door handles. Instead you have to find your way through the window. This is where breaking that bitch down comes in. In the midst of breaking it you get scratched, bruised, and have lots of cuts. Some of the pain from breaking that window down sits on the surface of your skin. Some of the pain lays deep within. However, the first time you put on your shoes, run full force, and jump through that window is still the best time of your life.

I'm the girl that had to jump to finally get what I wanted. There were so many times I jumped. My parents tried to shelter me from what they called "too mature for me" books, so I had to sneak and read them at school in between breaks. Even when I should have been listening my mind was far away in a make-believe place. I also had to jump to really find myself. As a kid I heard "No" so many times. I was one of the victims of sheltering. So when I was able to finally get away I experienced everything. When I failed I kept it to myself, but when I succeeded the world needed to find out.

See when you're a kid you get used to hearing no's. You're supposed to look up to adults and think they know all that is best for you. What they don't tell you is that the no's never stop. Even after you've experienced and succeeded they are still ready to say no. For some it's because deep in their heart they are comparing you to themselves and they could never do it. For some they just don't want to see you be good at something they know nothing about. For others they will always believe "No" is the right answer until they see you do it. So it starts at a thousand no's but by the time life ends it can increase to a billion.

That just means that us brave people will have to jump through that closed window and risk bruises a billion times.

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